Had a bad day?
Then why not kill something? It’s still the best known way to cure bloodlust.
And if you’re looking for a good way to kill shit without all that pesky police, court system then prison business, Time Crisis 4 just may be your go. You get to wield a somewhat chunky weapon and blow away anything that moves, but the only things that die are pixels; LOTS of pixels.
For the unfamiliar, TC4 is the latest arcade game in a series that, believe it or not, numbers four thus far. The arcade machine comes armed with a built-in light gun, which you point at the screen to blam baddies and such into next week. And, to be honest, it’s the gun element – as with other games of this type, from Operation Wolf through Lethal Enforcers – that makes the thing playable. So, obviously, upon bringing it to a home system Namco had to ensure it had a gun to be any cop at all.
And what a gun we get! Joining the ranks of Jaffas, Fanta, carrots, pumpkins, bad fake tans and Oompa Loompas, the GunCon 3 controller (or ‘G/C System Product #3’ as it is actually marked) comes in a natty shade of lollipop lady orange; presumably so you can ‘be seen, be safe’ whilst you erase breath from everything that crosses your crosshairs. Nice! As well as two analogue controllers bolted on, it seemingly has more buttons than a granny’s sewing tin – but more on these later.
It’s accompanied by what at first sight appear to be rubber bondage accessories, but upon closer inspection are LED sensors that you drape over your TV so the gun actually works. With cables everywhere they’re the very definition of inelegant; as to why Namco couldn’t come up with something somewhat more aesthetically pleasing like, say, the Wii sensor bar is beyond our comprehension. Even the gun has a bloody cable!
As for the software, the main attraction here is the arcade version of Time Crisis 4. And that’s basically what it is – long gone are the days when home arcade conversions were pale imitations of their coinage-gobbling forebears. The plot involves terrorists (quelle surprise!) and a government experiment gone wrong in “Terror Bites”, little insectibug-like robots that swarm all over the place causing havoc.
Ultimately, though, they’re nothing that a bit of machine gun fire or a few shotty blasts can’t make mincemeat of. Basically it could be an episode of 24; it’s big, dumb and full of… uh, completely over-the-top, relentless action - and it’s great mindless fun for this very reason (even if nobody says: “nucular”).
To Namco’s credit, they’ve tried to add value to the package – after all, the arcade experience isn’t designed to be an incredibly protracted one, and it won’t take long to realise that an hour or so of play is all that’s involved in completing it, five skill levels or not. They’ve accomplished this by coming up with a bonus game, essentially an FPS whereby you’re not glued on rails as you are in the arcade mode, but are free to roam about like the Quakes and Halos of this world.
This is where the myriad extra buttons on the GunCon come into play – and where left-handers everywhere start swearing, pouting and stomping their feet, as they’ve got Buckley’s chance of using the thing. However, we’ll let you into a secret, oh lefties of the world… you’re missing out on bugger all, as the FPS bit of the game is shite. Even the earliest PS3 releases in the genre poo on this from a mighty height, so you can pick those bottom lips up right now before you trip over them.
Oh yes, there are also a few target shooting games added, which bear no relevance to the whole TC story. They’re simple, but thoughtful, bonuses. Complete the main events and some more relevant mini-games are opened-up.
Ultimately, Time Crisis 4 is an arcade game, and as such it bears the limitations of the format – it was never designed for longevity, it was designed to sucker you into drip-feeding it coins so you could progress that little bit further. If you’re a huge fan, then you may wish to shell out the shekels for the gun ‘n’ game package – after all you’ll only have to play, erm, about 70 games to get your money’s worth if you’d have otherwise nourished the arcade machine – but if you’re a casual fan, the extras just don’t give it that ‘must-buy’ push (and the gun is bright fugly ORANGE for Jebus’ sake!), so you just won’t get the mileage for money you’d likely want for a Guitar Hero 3-like outlay.
Still, despite its fleetingness, it’s kinda fun.
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Graphics:
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On a par with the arcade, so no complaints.
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Sound:
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Like 24 episodes of 24 playing all at once - manic!
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Control:
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Decent - GunCon could be more accurate, though
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Gameplay:
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Arcade mode = ace, FPS mode = meh
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Verdict:
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If you're into arcade TC4, you'll really dig this
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Rating:
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3.5/5
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